In a conflict with significant bad actors on both sides, there are no good options for bystanders.In such a conflict, you have three options:
- you can take a side
- you can try to rise above the conflict
- you can do nothing
If you take a side, you will be associated with the bad actors on that side. If you try to say “I take this side but I don’t associate with the bad actors on this side”, you will come across as a hypocrite, or naive, or ignorant. And when the bad actors on your side do something wrong, which they will, you will be associated with that wrong too.
You might say, I don’t care. Or the other side is still worse. And that’s fine. But it doesn’t make this option a good one. It’s just an option you are willing to take.
If you try and rise above the conflict, then you will be criticized by both sides for ignoring the bad actors on the other side. In addition, you will be seen as ineffective and weak and irrelevant. Again, it’s an option, it’s just not a good one.
Doing nothing is the flipside of trying to rise above the conflict. You won’t be stuck with having to side with bad actors, but you will be criticized for being indifferent and uncaring, cold and thoughtless.
In life there are often situations where there is no good options to choose from. A conflict with significant bad actors on both sides is one of those situations.
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