Tag: families

Family meals are a good thing, but they are not the only good thing

From time to time articles will appear promoting the importance of families eating together. If you search on “how important is the family dinner table”, the first piece that you might see is an article from Stanford Medicine on Why the Family Meal Is Important.

I don’t deny that there is value in good family meals. But I was also heartend by this article, Bad Cook, Great Mom from Cup of Jo, where she writes:

 Before having kids, I envisioned sitting down for dinner, Norman Rockwell style, and sharing our hopes and dreams while breaking bread. But honestly? We didn’t have regular sit-down family dinners until Toby was around 10, and we still eat at the table together only a few times a week. And yet. I’m a terrible cook, but I crush it at being a mom.

When I think about my children leaving the nest and looking back on their childhoods, I know they won’t picture epic homemade meals because I did not serve many. We eat simply, and pizza is regularly ordered. But there are SO MANY BEAUTIFUL THINGS they will remember….

I think this is right. I also think this comment someone posted in response is also right (I added the bold):

Well I will say this: I am a good cook. I’m French and my English husband delights in my cooking. But last year, our 6yo French-British daughter gave me her Mother’s Day card, on which she had written “I love my mummy because… she’s a great soup maker”
To this day I am still laughing every time I see the card. Soup is what I make with all the tired veg from the bottom of the fridge when I am totally uninspired. And yet, I got the highest praise for it.
You never know what your children will remember fondly, really…

You never can know what your kids will remember fondly. The things important to you may not be important to them. And the things that other people think are important in their family (family meals) may be less so in your family. All you can do is try your best with the skills you have. There are many ways to be a good parent. Never forget that.

P.S. I’ve recently started having Sunday suppers with my adult kids and I really enjoy it. But I also have more time these days to do that. When they were smaller they weren’t into eating at the table and I was just happy when they were eating good food, regardless of where they ate it.

Where American live in their houses and why you need a smaller one

This is fascinating. Among other reasons, it shows so many people have significant amounts of their living space that they rarely use (the living room, the dining room). I imagine many eat their meals either in the kitchen or the family room. Based on this diagram, I can easily see people being able to get by with almost half the square footage pictured above.

It is nice to have that extra space, but if you wished you could live in a larger space but cannot afford it, you might console yourself with knowing you might not use it anyway. Save your money and live with what you need.