Daily Archives: April 8, 2010

On three steps to deal with an upsetting or overwhelming event in your life

I find when I am dealing with an upsetting or overwhelming events I need to do three things.

1) Acknowledge that the normal rules are put to the side for the time being. Day to day things which are not immediately relevant to whatever is overwhelming or upsetting you need to be minimized or put aside until you can deal with the situation at hand. I try to write down what is slipping so that I can deal with them in step 3. Writing them down helps you focus on the event but also helps you stop thinking about them. You need to shelve them in a way you can retrieve them later if need be.
2) Once the event has settled down somewhat, the first thing I do is rest. You need to recover somewhat, regain your energy and your strength so that you can go on to step 3. Overwhelming and upsetting events take more out of you than may sometimes acknowledge, but the need for rest will eventually catch up with you.
3a) If the event is subsiding but will start up again, you need to get help or change your life. Look at the things you put aside in step 1. Look at what you learned from dealing with what happened during the event. Take action before it occurs again.
3b) If the event is subsiding and will not start up again, you should still look at the things you put aside in step 1. Look at what you learned from dealing with what happened during the event. But now you should take action to better your life, or at least regain the parts that were good before the event occurred.